My journey as a widow with Rachel Faulkner Brown - Story 2
Jun 13 • 51:48
My journey as a widow with Rachel Faulkner Brown - Story 2
Episode:

My journey as a widow with Rachel Faulkner Brown - Story 2

June 13, 2024 • 51:48 • Courtney DeFeo

For our Summer of Stories, I got the pleasure of interviewing a dear friend Rachel Faulkner Brown about her incredibly hard and beautiful life. In the first half of this episode, we talk about her journey with losing two husbands and walking that grief journey twice. She shares so much wisdom for other widows as well as practical tips for all of us enduring lifes toughest pain.

In the second half of our chat, Rachel bravely shares about their familys most recent struggle - an eating disorder that quickly took a grip on her daughter. She provides invaluable insight and practical advice from the deeply painful journey they have walked.

My favorite part of the interview is when she shares honestly about the shame we can feel as mothers. As she watched her daughter walk through the hardest season of her life - she was also faced with a choice to hold onto that control or release her to God. We all have these moments in parenting and we can learn so much from Rachels incredible faith journey.

Im so thrilled for you to get to know Rachel. She is a dear friend and a woman that has experienced Gods goodness throughout some of the deepest pain in her life. You will be inspired by her calling to pass on the love of God and hope to others in their darkest days.

In this episode, we chat about:

  • How to practically move forward when you lose your spouse
  • How to wrestle with God when horribly hard things happen
  • How to lean into God when life is upside down
  • How to love our kids when its hard and you must release control
  • How to parent a child with an eating disorder

Chapters

00:00

Introduction and Background

10:46

The Importance of Honesty and Community

30:28

The Need for Aggressive Treatment

39:07

The Healing Journey and Future Hope

48:17

Prayer and Encouragement for Mothers

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo

Resources from todays show:

Never Alone Widows 

Father's House Bible Study

There is More podcast 

Podcast with Rachels daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1

Podcast with Rachels daughter about her eating disorder - Part 1

Reverend Joanne Moody

St. Teresa of Avila Quote

Healing prayer - resource 1

Healing prayer - resource 2

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Podcast:

Pardon the Mess

With Courtney DeFeo
As parents, we know raising kids is the opposite of neat and tidy. Each day brings wins, losses and valuable lessons. Pardon the Mess is a place where we discuss parenting and faith in a biblical, approachable and relatable way. We may cry and laugh while we learn and grow together in our beautiful mess. Follow Pardon the Mess on Instagram and Facebook!
All Episodes:
May 12 • 12:56
BONUS: Share: Be a Servant Leader

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all (Mark 9:35)

We all want our kids to be leaders in their communities now and in the future. As followers of Jesus, we are called to see ourselves last instead of first. In fact, the Bible tells us that the first shall be last and the last shall be first. This means we lead not by positioning ourselves well, but by seeing the needs of others and meeting those needs with our giftings and resources. 

When we serve and love others in this way, we serve and love God. This week, lets pray that our kids become humble servant leaders in their communities to make a big impact on Gods kingdom. Lets pray that they are the first to help when they see others in need and that they reflect Christs gentleness, mercy, and willingness to sacrificially serve and share with others.

Jesus, help us to lead like you do. May ______________ set aside their desire for power and accolades and serve out of a heart for you and your kingdom. I pray that they continue to make a difference in their community because of the example of service that you give us. May their heart stay humble and focused on you. Amen.

Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

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May 8 • 36:46
The mental load of motherhood and how to stay afloat with Emily Jensen

Have you ever heard the term mental load as it relates to what we carry as moms? It's the same as carrying every single thing up the stairs as your arms give way to the overload. Our minds do the same. We just snap because our minds arent meant to carry so much. So what do we do? How do we keep our care and responsibility high for our kids without drowning?

I was delighted to talk about this issue with Emily Jensen, founder of Risen Motherhood. Shes a mom of 5, author, speaker, podcaster and has so much encouragement and practical tips for us.

Mothers Day is this week and I want to challenge us. If you have some expectations or needs for what you need for that day - would you tell your spouse? Or family? Or children? This will help the day to be much smoother! 

My favorite part is when she shares about her recent decision to walk away from a big part of her ministry at Risen Motherhood. She put everything before the Lord and asked Him to confirm which things should go in this season. Wow! What a brave thing to do and I cant wait to see how He honors her with letting go of something so close to her heart.

Happy Mothers Day beautiful moms! You are so loved by God. You are doing a phenomenal job or raising your kids. Giving you a huge Texas hug!

Much love,

Courtney

(02:50) The Mission Behind 'A Million Tiny Moments'

(06:04) Understanding the Mental Load in Motherhood

(09:05) Strategies to Alleviate the Mental Load

(11:54) Long-Term vs. Short-Term Parenting Goals

(14:53) Finding Clarity Through Prayer and Decision-Making

(16:49) Navigating Life's Seasons

(21:27) Alleviating the Mental Load

(25:58) Empowering Kids with Responsibility

(28:15) Managing Expectations for Mother's Day

(32:31) Finding Peace in Motherhood

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo

Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith

Resources from todays show:

Connect with Emily

Risen Motherhood

A Million Tiny Moments - new book by Emily Jensen

Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide

NIV Application Bible

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Our Sponsors:
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* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com
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May 5 • 14:16
BONUS: Share: Seek Justice

No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God (Micah 6:8 NLT)

How do we reconcile fairness in a world that is unjust and broken? I always tell my kids, fair does not mean equal. We cant make everything fair in the world because fairness is how we are treated individually and everyones wants, situations, and abilities are different. Justice goes deeper than fairness. Justice is about what we deserve and we all deserve the same things. 

In the Bible, justice means everyonethe poor, the widows, the orphans, the immigrants, are cared for just like everyone else. 

Scripture calls us to care for these people, but that might seem really abstract to kids. So, we can teach our kids that seeking justice means including the kid with learning differences in class projects. Making sure the lonely kid is invited to the party. And it can mean standing up for what is right when someone is being wronged, bullied, or picked on. Actively seeking justice looks like our kids being a peacemaker instead of a peacekeeper and sometimes that is hard! But we are promised that the peacemakers will be called sons and daughters of God! 

This week, lets pray that our kids share Gods heart for others in the way they treat people around them. Lets pray that our kids hearts break for what breaks Gods and that they see injustice in the world and have the courage and faith to stand up to it.

God, I pray that _______________ will see what is right, love what is right, and humbly do what is right in your name. In an unjust world, I pray that _____________ will seek justice in all situations. When they see someone being mistreated, give them the courage to step in. When they see the opportunity to help, give them the ability to do so. I pray that as they grow they see injustices beyond their small communities and in the greater world and do what is in their power to right them. Amen.

https://churchonthemove.com/pursuing-justice

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May 1 • 29:29
3 core needs for every kid with Sissy Goff and David Thomas

They are back! Sissy Goff and David Thomas are back to equip us with 3 core needs for every kid. They are always so encouraging and so very practical. The work they have done in their counseling offices has helped thousands of parents just like me. I cling to their perspective and biblical encouragement. 

We talk about our kids need for resilience, courage and relationship. We also talk about the health benefits for your kids when they have a dog. I couldn't agree more and I was the most anti-dog person in our family until we got our dog. And if you want to go watch this one on YouTube - youll see a cute appearance by Sissys dog, Patches.

My favorite part was when they shared about our kids need for connection more than correction. I am so guilty of critiquing my kids and I can see their little faces sink when I do that. This is a huge reminder for us all to fight for connection instead of staying stuck in a loop of critique. What would the little kid in you want from your parents? Lets stay alert this week and catch ourselves when we lead with criticism. 

In this episode, we discuss: 

  • Health benefits of kids having a dog
  • Resilience and taking healthy risks 
  • How to speak courage into the lives of our kids
  • How to prioritize relationships 

Enjoy!

Courtney 

(02:59) Core Needs for Kids: The Importance of Dogs

(06:04) The Role of Courage in Child Development

(12:01) Healthy Risk Taking in Children

(17:59) Building Relationships and Social Skills

(23:57) Conclusion and Resources for Parents

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo

Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith

Resources from todays show:

Connect with Sissy and David

Daystar Counseling 

Daystar dogs - new books Owen Learns He Has What It Takes and Lucy Learns to Be Brave

Anxious Generation

Moms, Dads, and Grads Gift Guide

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Avocado Green Mattress: https://avocadomattress.com
* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Apr 28 • 9:14
BONUS: Share: Compassion

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you (Ephesians 4:32)

Compassion literally means to suffer together. It means that we see someones pain or needs and we want to help them. 

Jesus shows compassion over and over through scripture. We dont need to be afraid of stepping into someones suffering with them. Entering into that does not mean we take on their burdens or pain, it means we offer relief and love in any way we can. But no matter how we can help others or how others can help us, Jesus is always overflowing with compassion and with us in all our sufferings. 

This week, lets pray that our kids share compassion with others. Lets ask God to give them the eyes to see the needs around them and the compassion to move to action.

Jesus, help us to be more and more like you every day. I pray that _____________ grows to be filled with compassion. May their hearts overflow with compassion, just like yours does, when they see needs around them. May they step into the suffering of others knowing that you are there too. Amen.

Get your printed copy of A Life of Faith: Prayer Journal

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Our Sponsors:
* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com
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About the Host

Courtney DeFeo

Courtney DeFeo is the NEW host of Pardon the Mess! She is the author of In This House, We Will Giggle and Treasured and creator of ABC Scripture Cards and the kindness movement, Light ‘Em Up Acts. She loves to encourage parents and women through speaking, writing, and podcasting. She also serves on the board of For Girls Like You and Lighthouse Family Retreat. Her deepest desire is to encourage others and give generously in a way that draws people to God.

Her most honorable mention is her husband Ron and their two wildly fun girls (Ella, 16 and Larson, 14). Courtney is passionate about Jesus, coffee, Auburn football, Coca-Cola classic, her dog Mazie, spending time with friends and family, and finding deals at TJ Maxx. Although they have lived in Atlanta and Orlando, they currently reside in the DFW area. Courtney’s family loves to serve at Compass Church, travel together, and consume large amounts of table-side guacamole. Connect with Courtney on Instagram or visit CourtneyDeFeo.com.

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