Surviving an unwanted divorce with Lysa TerKeurst

I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart;

I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done.

I will be filled with joy because of you.

I will sing praises to your name, O Most High. (Psalm 9:12 NLT)

There is a story in the book of Luke where Jesus heals ten men with leprosy. The lepers saw Jesus coming, stood at a distance, and called out for him to heal them. When he did, just one of the lepers came back to thank him. The leper didnt just thank him, he praised him in a loud voice and threw himself at Jesuss feet. He was filled with gratitude.

This mans life was changed; he knew it and he was not going to be silent about it. The crazy thing is that this man was a Samaritan, meaning he had never known the one true God until Jesus came and changed his life forever. That type of gratitude, that realization that Jesus has completely saved us, moves us to love Jesus more.

We live in a much easier world. There is no leprosy for us to fear, medical care is accessible, and grocery stores are fully stocked. We can even have something delivered to us the same day, using just our face to pay. Our life is pretty good! Its amazing! The downside is that its a lot harder to feel grateful for the everyday things God has blessed us with. Our hearts are easily hardened and discontent.

But we can be truly grateful for the gift of salvation every single day. Life may not be perfect every day, but Jesus loves us every day. Having a thankful heart toward him will draw us closer to him and increase our joy! Its hard to be grumpy when you are being thankful!

Lets pray that our kids recognize Jesuss gifts to them every day and that they move closer to him and praise him in response!

Lord, I pray that you would remind __________ daily of your love for them, that they would practice praising you for who you are and thanking you for your many blessings on a regular basis, that you would cultivate in them a grateful heart, and that you would help me model this in our home too!

If you love this episode and dont have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, its not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And dont forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Does anyone else feel like the holidays keep getting crazier and crazier? Busier and busier? On the podcast this week is Niro Feliciano. You may recognize from her regular appearances on The Today Show. She is a certified cognitive therapist, the co-founder of Integrative Counseling and Wellness Group in Wilton, CT and the author of All is CALMish. I love her professional insight and perspective on the pressure of Christmas. She reminds that the mental health of our families will benefit as we prioritize our presence over the perfection of Christmas.

Niro reflects on the significance of holiday celebrations and the importance of meaningful connections of superficial interactions. She shares her journey of reevaluating how she celebrates the holidays, empathizing with the need for deeper connections with loved ones and a more intentional approach to social gatherings. 

My favorite part is when Niro encourages us moms to find micro moments of joy during the holidays. As a mom, we can spin our wheels to make everything magical for all and we forget to encounter Jesus and take care of ourselves. What are some little things you can do to dial in the peace and joy and dial out the pressure and stress?  

Before we dive right into the same Christmas chaos, lets pray for God to order our days. How can we spend more time in the presence of Jesus? How can we focus on being over doing? What traditions and parties and commitments can we delete or pause to add more capacity?

Enjoy!

Courtney 

Chapters:

00:00 Navigating Holiday Stress

03:00 The Pressure of Perfection

06:07 Creating Meaningful Traditions

08:59 Connection Over Perfection

12:00 Finding Joy in Giving

14:55 Holiday Experiences in the City

15:32 Embracing the Holiday Spirit

18:20 Navigating Family Dynamics

25:31 Setting Boundaries for Joy

27:50 Modeling Joy for Future Generations

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo

ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW

Resources from todays show:

Connect with Niro

All is CALMish - Niros new book

Light Em Up Acts - ideas for giving 

NIV Application Bible

Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Then Samson prayed to the Lord, Sovereign Lord, remember me. Please, God, strengthen me just once more, and let me with one blow get revenge on the Philistines for my two eyes. (Judges 16:28)

Samson is known for his great strength and his great weaknesses. He was physically strong enough to kill a lion with his bare hands, and in the twenty years he led Israel, he killed hundreds and thousands of Philistines on his own. His weaknesses were his hair (it had to be long in order for him to be strong) and women. These weaknesses got him into trouble and eventually he was captured and the Lord left him. But in his final moments, he prayed for God to remember him and give him strength one more time, and the Lord answered.

Samson reminds us that we all have strengths and weaknesses. And even our strengths have to be used wisely in order to honor God. But at the end of the day, God is full of mercy, and he can redeem even our greatest weaknesses when we turn to him and ask him.

There may be times in our childrens lives when they turn away from God. They may go as far as rejecting Christ, or they may not honor him with their choices. But no mistake is too big for God. There is nothing our kids can do that God cannot redeem; he is always ready to restore us when we turn back to him.

This week, lets pray that our kids always follow God and honor him. But if they make mistakes or walk away, lets pray that they turn back to God, ask for mercy, and experience Gods amazing redemption.

Jesus, thank you for your amazing grace that restores us back to God. I pray that __________ will follow you all their life. But if they fall away, may they experience your redemption in a powerful way. Redeem the pain that they experience in their life, and even the mistakes they will make. Remind them that you are bigger than everything! I pray they are always confident in your goodness and in your desire to be in right relationship with them. Amen.

If you love this episode and dont have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, its not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And dont forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Are you going through an unwanted divorce? Or have a friend or family member going through an unwanted divorce? This powerful episode with Lysa TerKeurst is for you. Im so thankful that Lysa is using her own divorce experience, healing journey and biblical understanding to encourage other women.

Lysa shares about the significant challenges of an unwanted divorce. She shares about the unhelpful comments and verses thrown at people that choose divorce. She walks us through the powerful combination of theology and therapy and how those two things were key in her healing journey.

This episode isnt really for the person trying to determine IF they should divorce, its really for those that are already walking through the divorce from a destructive marriage and how to move forward. 

My favorite part is at the very end when she talks directly to the woman walking through an unwanted divorce. Her words are so tender and so encouraging. I am praying you will feel so seen. 

Enjoy!

Courtney

Chapter

(02:46) The Need for a New Book

(05:23) Understanding Divorce and Its Impact

(08:19) Theological Insights on Divorce

(11:05) Resources for Support

(13:47) Identity and Self-Worth

(15:19) Coping Strategies During Divorce

(15:39) Finding Wholeness After Divorce

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess 

Courtney DeFeo

ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW

Resources from todays show:

Connect with Lysa

Surviving an Unwanted Divorce - new book

Surviving an Unwanted Divorce - podcast series

Emily Lex Watercolor

What to Say and How to Say it to Your Teen

Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide

The Biggest Story Holy Bible for Kids

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

But Ruth replied, Dont ask me to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. (Ruth 1:16 NLT)

We often hear Ruth 1:16 recited at weddings, and rightfully so; it is a beautiful verse about family and loyalty. When Ruths husband died, she decided to stay with her mother-in-law, Naomi, even though it meant leaving behind life as she knew it. Eventually she married again. Ruths new husband was a good and kind man named Boaz, and she remained faithful in caring for her mother-in-law.

It would have been easy for Ruth to leave Naomi and start over. In fact, that is what Naomi tried to convince her to do. But Ruth was loyal to Naomi and to God, and she loved them both. Because of her kindness, God gave her a new family and a special place in his storyshe became great-grandmother to King David, making her part of the lineage of Jesus. God can do anything with anyone when they are faithful.

As parents, we have the opportunity to model the value of family, show our kids what it means to honor God by honoring each other, and raise our kids up to be loyal and kind. We would do anything for our kids, but even so, there will be times in parenting when it feels like your kids would choose to follow anyone else but you. In those moments, lean in and lavish them with love. We get to show them the love of Jesus in the way we parent them! Eventually that love will prepare them for their own family, and hopefully they will be as loyal to them and to God as Ruth was.

This week, lets pray that our kids love and serve their current and future families with loyal hearts.

Father God, you are the perfect father. Help __________ to love and serve their family. May they be loyal, kind, and faithful. May they trust in my guidance as a parent. And most importantly, may they trust in you as their perfect parent and stay faithfully devoted to you all the days of their life. May they never know a day without being in your presence. Amen.

If you love this episode and dont have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, its not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And dont forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org