Ep. 303: What Do I Do If My Child Is Cutting With Eliza Huie

In this conversation, Jay and Virgil explore the concept of missional households, emphasizing the importance of experiential learning, community, and intentional practices in family life. They discuss how to create a nurturing environment for spiritual growth, the significance of regular rhythms in the household, and adapting to life changes while maintaining a missional mindset. Through personal stories and practical advice, they highlight the transformative power of faith in everyday life.

Takeaways

• There's a difference between knowing about something and truly knowing it.

• Learning requires experience, community, and a compelling story.

• Discipleship is best understood as a relational network rather than individual mentorship.

• Deep learning occurs in community settings, not just through sermons.

• Intentional rhythms in the household can foster spiritual growth.

• Experiential learning can be integrated into family gatherings.

• Simplicity in practices makes them easier to maintain.

• Children learn through repetition and experience in their environment.

• Creating a missional household involves being consistent with values and practices.

• The narrative of a household can guide the family's mission and identity.

Lets Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Bio

As the Senior Director of OneTree, Virgil is responsible for leading the team to help mission, marketplace, and ministry leaders thrive holistically, do beautifully integrated work, and become everything God dreamed them to be, believing this to be a primary means for stewarding the reviving life of God through His people into the world.

Virgil holds a B.S. in Biology, an M.A. in Religion and Cross Cultural Studies, and an MEd. in Curriculum and Instruction. He is presently working on an EdD in Christian Leadership.

Resources mentioned:

https://www.onetreeministries.org/

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Support Lets Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay and Virgil explore the importance of character development over mere skills in leadership and parenting. They discuss the need for experiential learning in faith and the role of community in nurturing youth. The conversation emphasizes that discipleship should primarily occur in the home, supported by a network of relationships that foster growth and understanding.

They also discuss the importance of building significant relationships, particularly in the context of youth ministry. They explore the influence of social media on young people's lives, emphasizing the need for adults to step in and provide positive guidance. The discussion highlights the role of desire in shaping behavior and the necessity of intentional connections in youth ministry. They also address the importance of encouraging risk-taking and resilience in young people, advocating for experiential learning over theoretical knowledge. The conversation concludes with practical advice for parents on how to engage in transformative conversations with their children.

Takeaways

• Leaders often have more information than formation.

• Character is more important than skills in leadership.

• Experiential learning is crucial for true understanding.

• Discipleship must happen primarily in the home.

• Community plays a vital role in faith development.

• Youth often leave the faith due to lack of relational engagement.

• Knowing about something is different from truly knowing it.

• Parents' involvement in faith practice significantly impacts youth retention.

• Building a supportive network for youth is essential.

• Teaching faith should be experiential, communal, and narratively situated. Aim for at least seven significant adult relationships.

• Social media influences youth in unhealthy ways.

• Desire drives behavior more than cognition.

• Intentional connections can impact youth positively.

• Encouraging risk-taking helps build resilience.

• Experiential learning is more effective than theoretical knowledge.

• Transformative conversations can lead to deeper understanding.

• Modeling behavior is crucial for youth development.

• Recognizing and affirming individual strengths is important.

• Learning from failure is a valuable experience.

Lets Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Bio

As the Senior Director of OneTree, Virgil is responsible for leading the team to help mission, marketplace, and ministry leaders thrive holistically, do beautifully integrated work, and become everything God dreamed them to be, believing this to be a primary means for stewarding the reviving life of God through His people into the world.

Virgil holds a B.S. in Biology, an M.A. in Religion and Cross Cultural Studies, and an MEd. in Curriculum and Instruction. He is presently working on an EdD in Christian Leadership.

Resources mentioned:

https://www.onetreeministries.org/

Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! 

Support Lets Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay and David discuss the evolving challenges faced by children and adolescents in today's world, particularly in the context of counseling. They explore the importance of emotional regulation, the balance between naming feelings and navigating them, and the need for parents to find a healthy middle ground in their approach to parenting. The discussion also highlights the significance of building resilience in children through healthy risks and practical strategies, such as the 'exposures and ladders' approach to overcoming anxiety. Additionally, they introduce the Daystar Dog Series, which aims to teach resilience through stories featuring therapy dogs.

Takeaways

• The same child development principles apply today as in the past.

• Technology has significantly impacted the challenges children face.

• Parents may overcorrect in their approach to emotional support.

• Naming emotions is important, but navigating them is crucial.

• Resilience in children is diminishing due to overprotection.

• Healthy risks are essential for children's growth and development.

• Parents should reflect on what they do for their children that they could do themselves.

• Anxiety often stems from avoiding discomfort and challenges.

• Exposures and ladders can help children face their fears.

• Storytelling through the Daystar Dog Series can teach resilience.

Lets Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Bio

David Thomas, LMSW, is co-executive director of Daystar Counseling in Nashville, Tennessee, and the author of 10 books including his most recent book, Raising Emotionally Strong Boys (Bethany, June 2022). A frequent media guest and speaker, David has spoken to hundreds of thousands in person and millions via his Top 10 kids & family podcast, Raising Boys and Girls, now with more than 10 million downloads since its launch in 2018. Learn more at RaisingBoysAndGirls.com.

Resources mentioned:

Raising Boys and Girls website

Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! 

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In this episode, Jay Holland discusses the often-overlooked practice of fasting within the Christian faith. He shares personal reflections on his struggles with fasting, its biblical foundations, and the spiritual benefits it can bring to one's life, marriage, and parenting. Jay emphasizes the importance of humility and submission to God through fasting, encouraging listeners to consider making it a regular part of their spiritual journey.

Takeaways

• Fasting is a practice that can lead to spiritual breakthroughs.

• Jesus expected his followers to fast, just as they pray and give.

• Fasting is often under-taught and under-practiced in the Christian community.

• Fasting can help with clarity in decision-making and spiritual direction.

• The act of fasting cultivates humility and dependence on God.

• Fasting can aid in repentance and soften one's heart.

• Fasting is a way to tame the flesh and resist temptation.

• Fasting is not about manipulating God but seeking His will earnestly.

• Regular fasting can lead to a deeper relationship with God.

• Fasting should be approached with a heart of humility and submission.

Lets Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Resources mentioned:

Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! 

Support Lets Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

Jay Holland and Aaron Smith explore the transformative power of the gospel and prayer in relationships, particularly in marriage. They discuss the importance of recognizing one's identity in Christ, the challenges of receiving correction, and the significance of prayer as a means to align hearts with God's will. The discussion also highlights the 31-Day Marriage Prayer Challenge, designed to encourage couples to pray for each other and deepen their spiritual connection. Through personal anecdotes and biblical insights, they emphasize that prayer not only changes circumstances but also transforms individuals, fostering a deeper understanding of love and grace in relationships.

Takeaways

• Seeing your marriage as a ministry is crucial.

• It's important to not sacrifice family for ministry.

• Authenticity in leadership is essential for true connection.

• Accountability helps prevent disqualification in ministry.

• Being transparent about struggles fosters genuine relationships.

• Elders and deacons play a vital role in church health.

• Critique should be received with humility and openness.

• The gospel provides a foundation for handling criticism.

• True fellowship involves knowing and being known by others.

• Leadership requires both leading and being approachable.  The gospel reveals our true selves and lifts us up.

• Receiving correction is essential for growth.

• Prayer is a powerful tool for transformation in marriage.

• The 31-Day Prayer Challenge encourages couples to pray for each other.

• Prayer prompts help couples focus on specific needs.

• Aligning our hearts with God's will is crucial in prayer.

• Prayer changes our perspective on our spouse.

• The Holy Spirit guides us in our prayers.

• Gratitude in prayer opens our hearts to God's blessings.

• We can approach God directly in prayer, which is empowering.

Lets Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Bio

Aaron Smith is a Christian author, speaker, and co-founder of Marriage After God, a ministry dedicated to helping couples center their marriages on Christ. Alongside his wife, Jennifer, Aaron has written several books, including Marriage After God and 31 Prayers for My Spouse, equipping husbands and wives with biblical wisdom for a thriving, God-honoring relationship. Through blogging, social media, and the Marriage After God Podcast, Aaron encourages men to embrace their role as spiritual leaders in their homes. He is passionate about discipleship, marriage, and helping couples grow in faith together.

Resources mentioned:

https://marriageaftergod.com

The Marriage After God Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mag-marriage-advice-relationship-encouragement-we-discuss/id1349500084

Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! 

Support Lets Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/