An honest conversation with Matt Hammitt of Sanctus Real

What a privilege to have Matt Hammitt with us on Pardon the Mess today. You’re going to love our vulnerable conversation about his career, work-life balance, marriage struggles, and the challenges of walking away from old dreams when called by God to new ones. 

 

From 1996-2016, Matt was the lead singer and songwriter for the band Sanctus Real, touring the country extensively for the majority of the year. As he and his wife, Amy, began to have kids, Amy struggled with Matt’s touring schedule and the demands of raising their young family alone. 

 

The hit song “Lead Me” was born from the stress and struggle of balancing his marriage and family with his role in Sanctus Real. The lyrics of the song describe Amy’s need for Matt to lead their family well and to be more present. Although most of us are not lead singers of a band (or married to one), we can all relate to the push and pull between careers, dreams, and the huge responsibility of shepherding our families well. 

 

Matt has received three Dove Awards, has been nominated for two Grammy Awards, and recently released his book, Lead Me: Finding Courage to Fight for Your Marriage, Children, and Faith

 

This podcast is for all of us who have too many balls in the air and need a grace-filled reminder that God’s best for us sometimes requires a hard look at what we’re chasing. And it encourages us to really look at how our dreams impact the ones we love the very most. 

 


Love your spouse like you mean it with Bob Lepine

“If you could give all couples a single piece of advice for pursuing a Godly marriage, what would it be?” 

Bob Lepine is an author, radio show host, and pastor. He joins us today on Pardon the Mess to answer this question and so much more. Pastor Lepine encourages us to build our marriages on strong foundations so they can withstand the storms that inevitably come with time (and kids). 

Most of us probably had 1 Corinthians 13 read as a part of our wedding ceremony, but have we gone back to see how we’re following through? 

Are we patient with our spouse? 

Are we showing kindness in our daily interactions? 

Are we willing to live sacrificially in order to honor our spouse? 

Let’s be honest, the last few months have been full of upsets to our normal routine. Our marriages are probably feeling some of the strain. Bob Lepine has a great word for us on living with the daily intentionality required to to strengthen our marriages. 

Join me in taking a few minutes to consider how we can love our spouse well, while honoring the Lord in the process.

Love Like you Mean It


Identifying anxiety, panic, and fear in our kids with Ken Wilgus

Feeling anxious?

You’re not alone. Studies indicate that over a third of Americans report feelings of anxiety and depression as COVID-19 numbers continue to spike. There’s no playbook for how to navigate life in a pandemic. It can leave us (and our kids) feeling discouraged as we ponder the future.

But even without the stress of a pandemic, our kids face varying degrees of fear and anxiety throughout their lives, critical topics for all parents to consider.

Ken Wilgus is a licensed psychologist who specializes in the treatment of adolescents and their families. He’s joining us today to talk about parenting our kids through fear and anxiety. May I just say, you’re not going to want to miss a second of this!

Here are some of the areas we cover:

The difference between fear, anxiety, and panic
Identifying when our kids are struggling with anxiety
The physical components of panic
Unhelpful things parents do
The genetic components of anxiety and recognizing it in our own lives
Healthy coping mechanisms when our kids are fearful or anxious
Practical tips to prevent fear and anxiety before they occur

A friend sent me the link to Dr. Wilgus’ discussion on this topic, published on his podcast, Feeding the Mouth That Bites You. I knew it was just the word we need as we begin to think about back-to-school and all it entails.

I can’t wait for you to hear Dr. Wilgus today. And I have a feeling that you may even want the teens in your life to listen as well. (I know I did!)


A great reminder to “stand all the way up” with Sophie Hudson

I can’t think of anyone who doesn’t need a good laugh as we plow through another month of the weird new normal called 2020. You’re going to want to carry me off on your shoulders after our Pardon the Mess conversation with Sophie Hudson. And you will equally enjoy her book, Stand all the Way Up.

 

Sophie has an honest and hilarious point of view on how to face the hard places in life that keep us up at night and make us want to “burn it all down.” During a hard time in her own life, she shares how she learned that the Lord has already provided all we need to “get up, straighten up, and stand all the way up” for our faith and the underdog. She reminds us that for every God-given task we are handed, he will equip us.

 

Sophie is hilarious, vulnerable, and has a good word for us in a time when it would be easier to pull the covers over our head and wait for a vaccine. Be encouraged that in our hardest days the Lord can have the biggest impact, if we will just allow him to use our weakness for his great glory.

 

Oh, and don’t miss Sophie’s words on turning fifty and her best advice to her younger self. It’s good stuff!

 

Check out Sophie and Melanie Shankle’s Big Boo Podcast!


The six needs of every child with Amy and Jeffrey Olrick

I think we can agree that one of the hardest parts of our COVID-19 existence is the lack of connection with friends and family. In our present circumstances, it has become very evident just how much we need connection, and it starts at the earliest of ages with our kids.

 

I’m thrilled to have Amy and Jeffrey Olrick on our podcast today, discussing this very topic. They speak to the six needs every child possesses in relation to connection. Amy and Jeffrey’s integration of neuroscience and practical parenting is a great reminder that God created us to be relational, and our kids need us to be present, not perfect.

 

We chat about topics such as:

 

  • Delighting in our kids because of who they are and not because of what they’ve done.
  • The importance of setting boundaries and considering our motives behind them.
  • Giving ourselves grace on the bad days and knowing that parenting is a life-long pursuit.

 

You’re going to love how Amy and Jeffrey practically break our kids’ needs down into six essential areas. Join us and be encouraged.


Dealing with the fear virus with Pastor Ed Young

As I’ve been working through the new realities of this pandemic, I’ve felt a bit of fear creeping into my life. Maybe it’s because I live in a COVID-19 “hot spot.” Or, it could be that as things have opened up in our state, my family is inevitably facing increased exposure to the virus. Either way, my lack of control over things I previously thought I could manage has revealed how quickly fear can replace faith in my life.

I’m guessing I’m not alone.

Ed Young, Senior Pastor of Fellowship Church, joins us on Pardon the Mess today to talk through dealing with fear in these uncertain days. In his new book, The Fear Virus, he encourages us to get “historical, not hysterical” when we’re fearful. Being historical means going back to all the places where God has been faithful in our past and using those times to remind us that God will continue to be faithful in the present.

Pastor Young shares with us the significance of trusting God in the face of fear and how to do that practically: naming our fears, taking captive our thoughts, and praying for wisdom and guidance. Trusting God is a daily (sometimes momentary) decision, and in days like these, it often means we deliberately choose to cling to God’s words instead of the words filling the air all around us.

You will love Ed Young’s vulnerable and entertaining words for us today! I’m praying this podcast will refresh you and bring biblical encouragement as you identify the areas of fear you’re struggling with.


Encouragement for special needs parents with Jamie Sumner

The disciples were walking with Jesus one day when they happened upon a blind man. They asked Jesus whether the man’s parents or the man himself had sinned, causing him to be blind. Jesus said neither, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him” (John 9:1–3). And then Jesus put mud on the blind man’s eyes and gave him sight.

 

Discussing the truths of this passage of Scripture might be my favorite part of today’s podcast: the reminder that whether it’s sickness, health, disability, or poverty, God can use all of these things for his glory!

 

Jamie Sumner joins me with words of encouragement for those raising special needs children and for the rest of us walking the road with them. You will love her practical and heartfelt words describing her own journey in raising Charlie while also sharing some of the difficulties she’s faced with guilt, her marriage, finances, and managing disappointments and unmet expectations.

 

Jamie suggests how we can support those around us raising special needs children and how to guide our kids in their interactions with these precious kids. She encourages us to look at bravery in parenting from a different perspective and reminds us that our kids were God’s first so we can trust him in all the messy details.

 

I love how she ends her book, Eat, Sleep, Save the World: Words of Encouragement for the Special Needs Parent:

 

“Parenting a child who needs help to move, to speak, to interact with others is gritty. It takes courage and determination to know when to help and when to let go, when to fight for them and when to let them into the ring alone.”

 

Praying grit for every single one of us raising kids today!


Celebrating Father’s Day and our favorite “daddisms” with Jerrad Lopes

Happy Father’s Day to our dads!

 

Father’s Day wasn’t officially recognized as a national holiday until 1972. And almost fifty years later, we’re still thankful for the opportunity to celebrate all the dads in our lives and what they mean to our families.

 

As we think fondly of our dads this weekend, let’s not miss the opportunity to acknowledge the universal “daddisms” that make them who they are.

 

For instance, when they say things like:

 

  • “Don’t spend it all in one place” (after giving you virtually no money at all).
  • “I’m not sleeping, I’m just resting my eyes.”
  • “When I was your age . . .”
  • “Don’t pay someone to fix that when I can do it.”
  • “Were you raised in a barn?”
  • “They don’t make them like they used to.”

 

And then there’s the little things they do like driving endlessly around parking lots in search of the“perfect” spot, or insisting we have a little cash before getting on an airplane (as if cash will be our primary concern if the plane runs into trouble).

 

It’s the small things that make us big fans of the dads in our lives. And if you’re fortunate enough to have a dad who loves the Lord and has led your family well spiritually, then you’re doubly blessed.

 

In honor of our dads, we’re bringing you two podcasts this week!

 

In our first podcast, Jerrad Lopes of Dad Tired encourages men to lead well in their homes while also giving all of us wives some thoughts on how best to encourage our husbands as they lead.

 

I hope you have a wonderful Father’s Day weekend, and be sure to share these podcasts with the men in your life.


Celebrating Father’s Day and our favorite “daddisms” with Steve Graves

A Happy Father’s Day to our dads!

Father’s Day wasn’t officially recognized as a national holiday until 1972. And almost fifty years later, we’re still thankful for the opportunity to celebrate all the dads in our lives and what they mean to our families.

As we think fondly of our dads this weekend, let’s not miss the opportunity to acknowledge the universal “daddisms” that make them who they are.

For instance, when they say things like:

 

  • “Don’t spend it all in one place” (after giving you virtually no money at all).
  • “I’m not sleeping, I’m just resting my eyes.”
  • “When I was your age . . .”
  • “Don’t pay someone to fix that when I can do it.”
  • “Were you raised in a barn?”
  • “They don’t make them like they used to.”

And then there’s the little things they do like driving endlessly around parking lots in search of the“perfect” spot, or insisting we have a little cash before getting on an airplane (as if cash will be our primary concern if the plane runs into trouble).

It’s the small things that make us big fans of the dads in our lives. And if you’re fortunate enough to have a dad who loves the Lord and has led your family well spiritually, then you’re doubly blessed.

In honor of our dads, we’re bringing you two podcasts this week!

Today, Steve Graves chats with my husband and me about crucial conversations every dad needs to have with their sons.

I hope you have a wonderful Father’s Day weekend, and be sure to share these podcasts with the men in your life.

Get Steve's book, 41 Deposits here!