Kate’s Hudson’s choices
Kate Hudson welcomed a baby girl to her family last fall. Later, in an interview with AOL, she made a statement that she has since been trying to explain. The interviewer asked Hudson how raising a girl is different than raising her boys—a funny question because her daughter was a newborn at the time.
She said, “It doesn’t really change my approach, but there’s definitely a difference. I think you just raise your kids individually regardless—like a genderless [approach].”
Of course, the media and others jumped all over that statement. Her response went viral.
Kate Hudson’s Instagram message after her daughter’s birth called her “our little rosebud.” She has said that she is having so much fun buying her daughter clothes. And most of the photos she has posted of Rani, her daughter, show her with bows and very gender-specific, adorable outfits. Kate Hudson is enjoying her little girl and it shows.
Rani is Kate’s third child, each from a different relationship. Kate Hudson was married to her oldest son’s father, engaged to her second son’s father, and is now living with her daughter’s dad.
Kate has been in the news since she was born because she is the daughter of the famous actress Goldie Hawn and the stepdaughter of a famous man, Kurt Russell. Kate’s mom taught her about making choices by the way she made her own. Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have chosen not to marry.
What is a choice?
And that is really the point of this article. If you are raising kids in today’s culture, then you have some choices to make that previous generations didn’t. More importantly, the culture is giving our kids choices to make that have never been offered before. Gender is just one example.
Teaching our kids to make good choices has always been an important part of parenting, but now we also need to teach our kids how to define the concept of a choice.
The privilege of choice is a gift of God. Human beings are unique creations because God gave us the ability to choose. But what does the Bible teach us and our kids about using our gift of choice?
What does the Bible teach about making choices?
God has given us the information we need to make great choices.
God did not leave us with the need to guess. He gave us his word, his directions, so that we would be able to understand and make our best choices.
As parents, we need to teach our kids that knowing and obeying God’s word should direct our choices. Jesus said, “Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness” (Matthew 6:33) and the rest of life can be added to that choice.
The right choice is not always going to be the popular choice.
Americans teach their children to value democracy. Our country was founded on the fundamental rights offered by popular choice. But John Adams, one of the founding fathers said, “Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.” Democracy only works if the majority of people will choose what is right and best for the country.
Jesus taught his disciples, “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many” (Matthew 7:13). John Adams was not saying that Christianity is essential to democracy, but he was saying morality is. Jesus taught that Christianity was the only path to choose, but that path would not be the popular choice. If we want our kids to choose well, they will occasionally need to feel good about making the unpopular choice.
Choose who will impress and who will depress.
It might be okay to keep up with the Kardashians as long as you are walking a different road. Proverbs 12:15 says, “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.” Kids are naturally interested in the people who are making news, making movies and television, and making music. Often, these same people are making “fools” of themselves, literally.
If our kids will learn the importance of discernment, they will choose to be influenced by the right people and listen to their advice. Our kids might not have as many followers on their Instagram accounts, but they hopefully won’t suffer the depression that often results from having a multitude of foolish followers.
The most important choice is best made as a child.
The earlier your child receives God’s Holy Spirit, the earlier they will have access to his perfect wisdom, strength, and guidance. A great way to bring up the message of salvation to a child is to tell them they can make the most important decision of their entire life, today. Then tell them each day they can choose to live by the Spirit’s leadership or by something less important.
Galatians 5:25 says, “Since we live by the Spirit, let’s keep in step with the Spirit.” The words keep in step mean to dance with or march with in perfect unison. The key is to allow Jesus to lead.
Choose who to serve
We live in a great country, with great possibilities. But the trends can make us feel like we need to draw away from our culture. If our kids have the ability to choose, they will have a better chance of navigating the culture instead of needing to withdraw from it. Strong Christians are actually made stronger and blessed each time they choose to serve God. Jesus said, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and keep it!” (Luke 11:28).
We can live in our changing culture as the salt and light of Christ. In fact, we need to. Our children can learn to do the same. If we choose to serve God, chances are, our kids will as well. That’s not a guarantee because no amount of parenting will remove the God-given free will of your child. But, parents offer a powerful influence that their kids are likely to follow (#eventually).
Love is a powerful choice
I’m sure Kate Hudson’s kids love their mom and she loves them. Love is a powerful influence, but not always the best one.
Kate loves her mom, Goldie Hawn. Growing up, she watched her mom be interviewed by important people and heard her say that marriage was unnecessary. Goldie Hawn often talked about love being the only thing that mattered. I wonder if Goldie Hawn looks at her three beautiful grandchildren, each with a different father, and feels that same way.
Our children love us and our choices will influence theirs. Thankfully, by God’s grace and our honesty, our kids can also learn from our wrong choices. We all make some bad ones!
How are Mom and Dad navigating this changing culture?
Is the word of God and the guidance of the Holy Spirit your first choice?
I know, even as I type those words, someone reading just felt God tug their heart and mind. Please listen. Your kids need you to choose wisely and they are watching.
Your kids love you, and your influence, although imperfect, can make all the difference. Let’s use the power of love, to teach our kids how to make great choices. Joshua told the people, “Choose this day whom you will serve . . . . But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15).
That’s still the best choice any of us will ever make.